Don’t force pet parenthood on kids – try a "Proxy Pet" instead.

Thinking about bringing a pet into your family to teach your kids some big-time responsibility? Sure, it's a pretty common tactic, but we're here to offer another approach.

Instead of putting your very real pet’s very crucial well-being in the hands of a child, why not pair your real pet with a "proxy pet"? It's a combo that can help aspiring pet parents learn the ropes of caregiving in a smart, safe way.

Read on to explore this concept and get tips to use it to your advantage.

What’s a proxy pet?

Picture a world where your kids learn important pet parenting lessons without ever needing to walk a dog in the rain or clean a litter box. This is the promise of "proxy pets," an innovative concept coined by... me with a name I just made up. But wait - the idea is scientifically backed, I promise!

A proxy pet can be any sort of simulated or faux animal—think stuffed plushies, robotic pets, or even virtual pets in apps and video games. These aren't just toys; they're designed to mimic the responsibilities of caring for a pet.

The philosophy behind "proxy pets" is that parents can use these simulated animals to teach young ones the responsibility and routine required to care for a dog or cat. They're a way to help children grasp what it means to be responsible for another life, albeit in a controlled and manageable way.

What qualifies as a proxy pet?

If you were a child in the 90s, you might remember begging your parents for a Poo-Chi robotic dog. 00's kids likely cared for a Nintendog or two. These days, there are even more options for proxy pets out there.

Younger kids might start with a stuffed animal, learning gentle care and affection. Older kids might graduate to robotic pets like Tombot, a mechanical Golden Retriever that grows and displays different life stages like a real pup - or a Joy for All Companion Cat that responds to touch like a real cat would.

For the digital-savvy, virtual pets on devices allow for complex care scenarios that teach the consequences of actions in a controlled digital environment.

Modeling responsible pet care

Combining a proxy pet with a real pet can be a game-changer. Here’s how this dynamic duo works: you bring home a real dog or cat and welcome them into your family, and concurrently, your child adopts their very own "pet". Over the next several weeks, you'll model appropriate pet parent behavior and encourage your little ones to emulate.

Let's say Fido's dinner time is 5pm on the dot. If your little one has a proxy pet, you'd encourage them to start their mealtime too. When it's time for a walk, they bring their own "pet" along. Baby steps!

Ultimately the proxy pet serves as a risk-free training tool, while your real pet brings the irreplaceable love and joy only a living buddy can offer. This method lets your child make mistakes, learn, and grow in a way that's less stressful for your real pet and allows for a smoother learning curve for your child.

Fake pets, real benefits

This combo is a real winner for teaching kids responsibility. They get to practice with their proxy pet—like learning the right feeding times, how to groom, and noticing when something's off. This practice makes moving on to real pets a lot smoother.

And guess what? Research from the University of Barcelona supports this approach. The 2017 study explored kids who bonded with a robotic pet named Pleo, a baby dinosaur-shaped bot, and developed many of the same feelings and smarts they would with a living pet.

Beyond just the practical stuff, this method taps into developing empathy and emotional IQ. Starting with a proxy pet helps kids grasp what it means to care for another life. The same research points out how robotic pets managed to keep kids engaged by displaying behaviors that made them seem needy and loveable, just like real pets.

Research also demonstrates that interactions with robotic animals can lower blood pressure, reduce feelings of boredom or sadness, and enhance mood. For instance, a study in 2021 found that dementia patients interacting with a robotic cat showed improved mood and cognitive engagement. Similarly, a 2016 study reported reduced stress, anxiety, and medication use among dementia patients after interacting with a robotic seal.

More IRL applications

Kids dreaming of being pet parents someday aren't the only ones who can get a kick out of a proxy pet. A 2009 study highlighted how robotic pets have helped children with autism spectrum disorder engage more in verbal interactions, participate in reciprocal activities, and enjoy richer social experiences. Even with a small group of only 11 participants, the findings are considered robust, supporting the use of robotic proxy pets as therapeutic tools.

Adults can benefit from these robotic companions too. A 2021 study showed that robotic pets can evoke empathetic responses and trigger nostalgic memories of past pets among elderly participants, significantly boosting emotional and social well-being in eldercare settings.

For those looking for the companionship of pets but may not be ready for the full responsibilities of caring for a real dog or cat, a proxy pet can be an excellent alternative.

The onus of responsibility

While kids might eagerly swear to contribute to pet-related tasks, Jennifer Sperry, DVM, advises caution: "As a veterinarian, and as a parent, I know that many children campaign for a pet by promising their parents that they’ll take excellent care of the animal, managing everything from feeding, to walking, to training. And I agree: pet care is an excellent way to teach both compassion and responsibility."

However, Dr. Sperry also points out that expecting children to fully manage pet care is unrealistic. "It is unreasonable to expect that a child will understand the full depth of their responsibility for another living being," she explains.

Children lack the experience and maturity to comprehend the full scope of what caring for a pet entails, particularly when it comes to major dilemmas like medical decisions, which can only be appropriately handled by adults.

Dr. Sperry emphasizes that while children can and should be involved in assisting with pet care, the ultimate responsibility must lie with the parents. "Welcoming a pet into the home is a family decision," she notes. "While parents should encourage their children to take an active role in pet care, they should also be prepared to take on all of the physical and financial responsibilities if necessary." This balanced approach ensures that the pet is cared for properly, even as children's interests and abilities evolve as they grow.

Remember, real pets rock

While proxy pets are fantastic learning tools, real pets offer unmatched companionship and teach us about deeper emotional connections and responsibilities. They're invaluable for families with children, helping to teach empathy, patience, understanding, and more.

Just remember, the bulk of pet responsibility should stay firmly with the adults in the family. It's the best way to set yourself - and your dog or cat - up for success.

Ready to try?

Thinking this might be the right approach for your family? Kick things off with a proxy pet and see how your child handles the responsibilities. Observe how they absorb your teachings and praise them for consistent care and gentle behavior. This thoughtful approach ensures your child learns important life skills while keeping your real pet happy and healthy.

Lizz Caputo is the Manager of Content Strategy at Figo, animal enthusiast, and owner of a rescued senior American Bully. Her hobbies include checking out new restaurants in her area, boxing, and petting dogs of all shapes and sizes.